I wasn't quite sure which forum to put this story in, so I apologise if it is of no use here.
This morning at approximately 0800 my retained alerter went off. I being quite lazy was in bed, as usual. I got dressed into my standard fire service working rig as is the newly installed procedure (pah! don't get me started) and started the minute or so sprint to the station.
My route takes me across a small recreation ground, in which many people walk their dogs. I have to check for dog mess while running, but that was not a problem today. The morning dog walkers were acting strange. Usually they say nice things like "hello" and "good luck!" and the younger members say things like "neenaw! neenaw!". This morning they were pointing at me. They never usually point at me.
Then I felt a draught. Down below.
My manhood was available for all to see. Luckily there were no children walking dogs today.
The moral of this story, is always check your flies before attanding fire calls. Or leaving your house.
