Mark, the rules for consultation are these:
1. Don't offer anything technical . Things that are too technical hurt their heads, and civil servants do not like to work with sore heads.
2. If there is anything that will be politically expedient, give it to them. They will welcome it with open arms.
3. Think up a load of phooey for a regulatory impact assessment for anything you suggest. For example, say that in the year 2094 on a Saturday in July when it is raining it might possibly save a gay firefighter from breaking his or her nail, so saving the local authority thousands in compensation. If you can prove that the firefighter will come from an ethnic minority so much the better. Do not worry about any scientific evidence for all this. No one will think to challenge it anyway. Just say you are from a private sector research body that used to be owned by HM Government.
4. Say that when you were on hols in the free democratic republic of Kikyaasspunkastan you couldn't help but notice that fire exit signs had a photograph of their leader, Yurapaininass Vladivitch Shootemall. Now that Kikyasspunkastan is part of the EU should we not do the same for European harmonization. However, suggest that we could have a local interpretation and have pictures of John Prescott, so that fire officers will be disinclined to inspect the building, leaving the potential for ongoing control to be given to building control.
5. Make sure that no matter whether it is right or wrong, you go down the pub and ask all your friends to sign a petition demanding that your measure be incorporated. Don't worry if they have any interest or knowledge about fire safety, neither will the policy makers or minister to whom you send the petition, but it will create a lot of post and civil servants don't like a lot of post. They have to spend time opening it, and they won't read the contents, only what it is you want and why you are bothering them. Then they will give it to you.
6. Tell them that whatever you want is not necessary in Scotland and Northern Ireland and that, by including it, it will make the guidance in Scotland and Northern ireland different, and then their opposite numbers there will have to run around like blue arsed flies wondering if they should have it too. The thought of that always gives them a chuckle, and reminds them who won the Battle of the Boyne and Culloden.
