Davo, Dont you start, its enough that the neighbours take great pleasure winding me up that I sometimes drive between the two houses. I can now claim legitamately that I was merely doing 7(2)(d)s. The truth is simpler, namely that I live in the country with no light pollution and the lane is so dark I walk into bushes otherwise. Plus if the Princess is making a royal visit, she worries about her shoes on the unmade lane and insists on a royal motorcade.
Messey: Typical fire safety officer- you just want black and white training, with no underpinning education that would allow informed decision making. I think the OIC felt enriched by our chat as we walked up the lane. Even if he didnt, he would not have been rude enough to say so as Surrey F&RS are really cool, their fire safety officers never shout at people but are always mild mannered and helpful, and they rarely if ever chew gum. Your best hope for your erstwhile employer is that, on regionalisation, it becomes Surrey's eastern command.