Seems to me that the insurance company are using a bit of common sense by acknowledging that a 3 litre extinguisher isn't as effective in the average user's hands as a larger model. If that's their policy, that's their policy. I'd argue the case for that all day long.
13A ratings were about all 9 litre water
jet extinguishers could manage. Fit a spray nozzle on a 9 litre water and you can readily achieve a 21A rating. Fitting a spray nozzle to a 6 litre water extinguisher allows you to readily achieve a 13A. To achieve a 13A with a 3 litre extinguisher is not that easy; one because of the shorter discharge time and two, because you have less media. Granted it's a more effective media but unless you know exactly what you're doing you'll get no where near a 13A with 3 litres. As far as the EN3 test fires go, the extinguisher
can be as effective as a 6 litre but remember that there's quite a difference between a 13A fire and a 21A fire. A 6 litre will achieve a 13A readily and will go some way towards a 21A rating. A 3 litre will just scrape a 13A. You can't say that they have the same performance just because they achieve the same test rating.
For the small amount of extra weight, I'd always recommend a 6 litre over a 3 litre. By the time the operator has fired the first litre up their nose there'll be next to nothing left in a 3 litre. I won't even mention the environmental issues.
Standard fitment is as Anthony has suggested; 6 litre water spray for general class A risks; unless there is a specific class B risk, in which case it goes off the type, size and location of the class B risk as to what extinguisher(s) should be specified.
I wouldn't go so far to say that water jet extinguishers are 99% obsolete Anthony - warehouses with high racking would be a typical application or anywhere else you need a bit more range. Having said that, last I looked, EN3 doesn't detail any discharge length (that strangely ended in BS 5423) but the old 4m-spray, 6m-jet figures seem to have stuck around. I remember that caused a few red faces at the FIA when I pointed out that the question on their extinguisher technician course exam was wrong.
I can't in all honesty think of an instance where a user wouldn't be able to manage a 6 litre extinguisher, therefore, would not consider a 3 litre under any circumstances.